Don't Let Go Read online

  “You pick three things, I will pick three things, and we can share,” he compromises.

  I pick a shrimp and two vegetables and Brady picks three meat tapas. After my first sangria, I switch to water.

  As we sit back in our seats waiting for our food, I start drilling Brady with questions.

  “So tell me, do you plan on making a go of it with The Invisibles?”

  “Um…no.” He leans back, hesitant to answer the question. “I love music and I will miss it, but I don’t want it as my career.”

  “Do the others know that?”

  “Yeah, Trey and Hulk are enrolled in school, too. It’s only Robbie who seems to want to pursue the dream of rock ‘n roll. He left school last year with only a year left, and I have been trying to get him to enroll again for spring semester.”

  “What is your major?” I ask him since he never told me, Grant did.

  “Engineering. Yours?” he asks in return.

  “What kind of engineering?” I dodge his question.

  “Civil. Again, what’s yours?”

  “Why Engineering?” I spit out another question.

  “I love to build things. Always have,” he answers. “Now, what is your major?”

  “Guess,” I say.

  “Hmm…” he contemplates. “Education. No, that’s not it.” He thinks some more. “Design, no not that either.” He puts his finger to his lip, smirking over to me. “How about Psychology?” He smiles as though he already knew the answer.

  “How did you know?” I ask, shocked.

  “My secret. I don’t know what you want to do with it though.” His tone becomes serious again.

  “I haven’t decided. I hate the idea of being in school anymore, but I would love to counsel people,” I reveal.

  “So, you haven’t applied for graduate school yet?” He seems concerned.

  “No, I decided to take a year off.”

  “Where did you say you are from again?” he asks innocently.

  I can’t decide if I should lie or start telling the truth. I’m not ready to tell him yet, but I don’t want to lie either. I’m thankful the food comes just as I’m about to spit the truth out. But Brady can’t be detoured. After Sergio leaves the plates and we start picking at the food, he asks me again.

  “Um…I don’t care to talk about my past,” I honestly answer.

  “I understand, you tell me what you want. If I pry too much, let me know. But Sadie?” He waits for my full attention. “At some point I want you to trust me enough to tell me everything, okay?” he says and I nod.

  “I’m from Maryland,” I reply, divulging the truth.

  “Huh,” he says, remembering I lied previously to him, but he lets it go. “Did you leave both parents behind?” He cuts up his meat.

  “Yes, my parents are married, living in Maryland, and wondering what the hell I’m doing down here,” I confess, making this seem too easy to reveal my past.

  “Why did you leave school with only one year left?” I can tell he knows this is a bad question, but he is trying to figure out how far he can dig.

  “Too much prying,” I inform him and he nods his head in confirmation. “What about you?”

  “Let’s see. As you already know, I’ve lived here my whole life. My parents are divorced. My mom lives in Florida and my dad is still around. I live with Robbie, Trey, and Hulk off campus. That’s about it.” He pops a shrimp in his mouth, smiling.

  “You make it sound so simple.” I admire him.

  “Oh believe me, my life is anything but simple,” he admits.

  We lighten up the conversation after that, talking about music and movies. Besides eighties music, the only thing we have in common is that we both love horror films.

  After we finish the dinner, Brady pays the bill and escorts me out of the small restaurant. Butterflies fill my stomach when he grabs my hand outside and leads me back to the car. We only drive a few miles down the road to an area where bars fill each side of the road. He parks in one of the vacant lots, paying the man his parking fee. When he opens the door for me to get out, he pulls me into him.

  “I’m really betting that when you pleaded the Fifth, it was because you enjoy eighties music.” He turns me around to face the bar across the street where a big sign across the entrance reads “Monday – Eighties Night”.

  “I guess we will have to see, won’t we?” I smirk over at him and he wraps his arms around me, pulling me in closer. This is it; he’s going to kiss me. His mouth draws closer to mine and I suck in a breath, licking my lips in anticipation. Right as I feel them brush along mine, he slowly moves to my cheek.

  “You have no idea how much I want to feel your body against mine.” He kisses my cheek and grabs my hand, leading me into the bar. I stagger behind him as my heart picks up another beat.

  We enter the bar and I’m pleased to find it’s a mix of different ages, not just the usual drunken college kids. Brady guides me past a couple of tables, taking one right next to the large dance area. There are still a lot of empty tables, but the dance floor overflows with couples. I don’t notice any groups of a single gender huddled together, but rather everyone seems to be half of a couple. “Total Eclipse of the Heart” by Bonnie Tyler plays over the speakers while the couples dance, holding each other close.

  Brady motions for me to sit in a chair and then takes the seat across from me. His smile hasn’t faltered all night and I’m enjoying how easygoing his personality is. The waitress comes by, looking him up and down, but he only looks at me until I give my drink order. He gives his order and then thanks her. Either he is oblivious to women checking him out, or he has the courtesy not to look when he is on a date because the waitress is young and attractive.

  The tall brunette brings our drinks and I take a small sip of my vodka tonic while Brady drinks his water. Since I have met him, he hasn’t had one drink. This spurs a red light for me. Is he a recovering alcoholic like Jessa asked?

  “How come you never drink?” I wonder if he’ll lie to me.

  “I do but I’m driving tonight. Anyway, I would never put you in harm’s way.” He glances over and then turns back toward the dance floor. I can’t help but feel he is keeping something from me.

  “One drink wouldn’t hurt,” I offer.

  “That’s what a lot of people think.” His voice goes cold and I know I struck a chord.

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you,” I say softly, swirling the straw around my drink.

  “You didn’t. It’s just everyone always asks…” he says, trailing off and then abruptly, he scoots out of his chair. “Let’s dance.” He holds out his hand.

  “Footloose” by Kenny Loggins plays over the speakers while the men swing their partners around. Suddenly, I’m incredibly nervous. With only a couple sips of my drink, I’m entirely too sober to dance, especially in front of Brady. I press my heels to the ground in front of the wood planks and shake my head at Brady, but he grins and pulls me harder. I reluctantly follow, dragging my feet while Brady walks to the center of the room. We are more camouflaged here and I start to feel more comfortable. I move side to side, displaying my lack of dance skills. As much as it scares me to be close to Brady, I would rather be slow dancing than show my lack of ability to follow a beat.

  Brady wraps his arm around my waist and rests his hand on the small of my back, drawing me into him. I hold my hand in his and he leads us around the dance floor in a smooth form of the box step. A calm feeling absorbs me and I start enjoying myself before he pushes me away from him. When he pulls me back to him, I smack into him and both his hands fall to my waist, catching me. We both laugh. As much as I hate to admit it, I think he just discovered I can’t dance. But instead of letting me go, he pushes me out again and this time I attempt to come back more gracefully.

  We dance for another three songs before we make our way back to the table. My cheeks hurt from the constant smiles and laughs. He holds the chair out for me like the gentleman he is, while I t
uck my dress under me and take a seat. My drink is completely watered down, and since we were gone from the table, I don’t really want to drink it. The cute brunette comes by and asks Brady if we want something else, never glancing my way. He looks over at me for an answer, forcing her eyes to follow his. I tell her I’ll take a water and Brady asks for the same.

  A couple minutes later, she brings bottles of water and two glasses of ice. Brady twists my cap off and pours it into the glass for me. “Your mom raised you well,” I compliment his chivalry skills.

  “Actually, it was my dad. He always told me to treat a girl the way you want your daughter to be treated.” One side of his mouth goes up while he places my bottle down and picks up his own.

  “Sounds like a wise man”.

  “Yeah.” He stares off toward the dance floor again. I’m starting to think Brady Carsen could have more secrets than me.

  “Where do The Invisibles play next?” I try to divert the topic.

  “Are you going to come?” He turns his head my way and smiles as though there wasn’t an awkward silence a moment ago.

  “I don’t know. Their music is okay but the lead singer is so incredibly…what’s the word?” I jokingly look up at the ceiling and scrunch the side of my mouth up.

  “Hot?” Brady asks.

  “No, that’s not it,” I say, still pretending to think.

  “Talented?” He smirks over at me.

  “Nope.” I smile.

  “Amazing?” He laughs.

  “He’s kind of…kind of a stalker,” I joke, trying to conceal my giggle.

  “From what I hear, he sees what he wants and goes after it,” he confirms.

  “What do you think he wants?” I question.

  “I heard that he is completely infatuated with this incredibly beautiful girl. Hold on…I know her name…just give me a minute.” He taps his finger to his lips as though he’s thinking hard.

  “What a lucky girl”.

  “I know, right? I mean Brady Carsen is like the best catch.” He uses his best girl voice. “I think her name is Sadie. Yeah, that’s it, Sadie Miller. Do you know her?” He leans over the table toward me.

  “Yeah, I do. What on earth would he see in her? They are so different, surely his friends would disapprove?” I continue to joke, but Brady’s face drops.

  “Are you kidding me? Sadie walks into a room and every guy turns. From what he told me, she is not only gorgeous but smart and funny. The complete package with an amazing body to boot. As far as his friends, he could give a shit what they think and he wishes she would, too.” His brown eyes seem to have gotten a little darker as they pierce into me from across the table.

  I don’t know what to say. Thankfully, “Lady in Red” by Chris de Burgh fills the room and Brady takes my hand.

  “The last song of the evening and how fitting it is…my lady in red.” He nudges his hand on my back and leads me to the dance floor. He wraps his arms around me, resting his hands on the small of my back. I don’t know where to place my hands, so I ultimately rest them around his neck. We sway back and forth to one of my all-time favorite songs.

  Brady holds me close to his chest and my eyes automatically close, letting the beat of the music move my body. He softly sings the words in my ear as he leads me around the floor. His cheek presses against mine as though we are the only two people in the room. My heart beats out of control with his warm hands around me and his soft breath on my neck. I swear I feel his lips graze slightly against my neck and I ache for them to meet mine. I want him…I want him to be mine.

  As the song comes to an end, Brady doesn’t sing that last line, telling me he loves me. Instead he hugs me tightly, lifting my feet from the ground. “Thank you for the most incredible date I have ever been on.” He kisses my cheek again before he releases me.

  We leave the bar and surprisingly, the waitress looks at me as well as Brady and tells us to have a good night. The car is silent on the way home, but Brady holds my hand, rubbing his thumb across my finger. When he glances over at me, we exchange smiles. The ride back to my dorm feels too short. I don’t want to say goodnight to him, but I will never ask him to stay. The thought of him leaving me tomorrow after I sleep with him is unbearable.

  Brady parks the car in front of the dorm and his eyes move my way. For a brief moment, I think he is going to ask me to go home with him, but he opens the door and steps out. I watch him as he walks around the car before he opens my door. My body protests leaving the safe Camaro cocoon with him, but I get out and accept the hand he offers. He entwines our fingers and we slowly walk toward the doors. Emptiness fills my stomach with every step.

  When we get to the door, Brady asks for my keys. I hand them to him and he opens the dorm doors, motioning for me to enter before him. He turns me into the mail locker alcove to conceal us from passers-by. He leans me against the cold metal mailboxes and stretches his arm above my head. This is it; he is finally going to kiss me. I should have popped a mint in my mouth. His other hand moves up toward my face and his thumb lightly brushes over my lips. I stare into the caramel eyes, filled with desire and want. He tips his head down to me and before I have a chance to lick in preparation, his lips are on mine. He cups the side of my face and captures my bottom lip with his soft and gentle ones. I allow his tongue access after he slides his tongue between mine, asking to enter. We taste one another as our tongues mingle together. He tightens his hand against my cheek and draws his body closer to me.

  Brady slowly stops the kiss but continues to give me short tender kisses before he ultimately pulls away, leaving me numb.

  “This date keeps getting better,” he says softly and grins down at me.

  I smile back. I can’t think of a good come-back because I just want to beg him to do it all over again. I lean forward from the mailboxes and Brady puts his arm around my waist, leading me down the hall.

  The halls are empty since it is Monday night and almost everyone has class tomorrow. I don’t hear Jessa on the other side of the door, so I assume she is asleep. The pull to have him come in and climb into my bed with me is fierce. But I can’t take the chance he won’t be there tomorrow. That he will use me like the others.

  “Thank you, Sadie. I had a great time.” He leans me up against the door again, encasing me with his arms.

  “Me too,” I agree, “thank you.” I hold the doorknob behind my back with my hand and stare up at those eyes that could make me do some very bad things.

  He gives me a chaste kiss on the lips. “I will definitely be dreaming about you tonight.” His eyes roam my body, as though trying to burn the image in his head.

  “Goodnight, Brady.” I open the door before I beg him to come in.

  “Goodnight, Sadie. Sweet dreams,” he responds.

  I shut the door and lean against it, releasing the breath I have been holding. I’m in so much trouble. Brady Carsen just carved out another piece of my heart.

  Chapter 8

  The next morning, my stomach flutters every time I think about the dance with Brady. That’s nothing compared to when I think about the kiss. My whole body actually covers in goose bumps: in the shower, on my way to class, and eating lunch. He has consumed my thoughts every minute to the point that I have to finally stop listening to his music on my iPod.

  After my second class, I head back to the dorm and stop by the mailboxes. As I stand there, I can almost feel Brady’s lips on mine. I shuffle through the junk mail and land on a pink rectangle envelope. My fingers go weak and it almost drops to the ground. I can’t believe with everything going on, I forgot.

  I toss the junk mail in the nearby trashcan and make my way to the chairs in the common area. Resting my bag on the chair next to me, I carefully open the card. Star confetti drops in my lap as I pull the card out of the envelope. The card has a picture of a cake and the title says “To a Special Daughter on her Birthday”. My mom signed the card with love from her and my dad, instructing me to call soon but I know they don’t really me
an it. I have to admit the card puts a small smile on my face since last year they either forgot or didn’t care to celebrate.

  Tucking the card in my messenger bag, I head down the hall to my room. When I open the door, I wish I would have gone to the library. Rob is sitting in my chair, relaxing with his ankle on the opposite knee and Jessa sits in hers with her legs crossed. They seem to be watching something on television. I don’t want to be rude so I continue to enter.

  “Hey, Sadie,” Jessa says, looking at me over her shoulder.

  “Hi, Jessa,” I respond back. “Hi, Rob.” I wave over at him.

  “Hey,” he states callously. That pretty much sums up my conversation with him.

  I don’t want to be here with them, so I decide I will change to go work-out. Placing my messenger bag on the floor by my bed, I swap it with my gym bag.

  “Where you going, Sadie?” Jessa calls over when I get to the door.

  “Over to the rec center,” I tell her.

  “See you, Gucci,” Rob calls out, not taking his eyes off the television.

  I open the door and roll my eyes. Jessa mouths sorry at me before I shut the door. I don’t understand why she is with him and it hurts a little that she never says anything to him when he makes those comments.

  I get to the rec center with only five minutes before the kickboxing class is going to start. Scrambling in the locker room, I switch my shoes and shove my bag into a locker. I jog out to the room the class is being held in and am happy to see it isn’t as crowded as the night classes I usually attend. I sneak to the back row and recognize some of the girls from other classes, but am startled to see Brady’s friend, Kara, two rows in front of me. She is wearing a tight tank top and short black shorts. A tattoo peeks out on her right shoulder blade but I can’t tell what it says, just that it’s written in italic print.

  Sweat drips from my body and my shirt clings to me by the time the class finishes. I grab my towel and water bottle to head back to the women’s locker room when I spot Brady leaning against the wall. Athletic shorts hang from his hips and a gray t-shirt with a ring of sweat around the collar covers his chest.